And with a new attitude, and a new look to go with it!
So I had to take some time away from The Egg in blog form. You’d think, being a writer, that writing would get me through one of the hardest experiences I’ve had to face since starting on this journey, but in truth, I wanted nothing more than to just be silent and allow myself to come down to a simmer. I have never been so angry, and hurt, and confused as I was the first half of this year.
Our kinship adoption fell through, and with that, came the hell of kinship foster care. Now, let me say, that in the ideal situation, both of those scenarios can be beautiful and thriving for everyone involved, and that my personal situation should not be the reason for you or anyone else you know to not take the opportunity if it comes your way. I was hurt, yes, but if Doc Brown came by with the Delorean today, I’d do it all again in a heartbeat.
Why?
Because despite the ignorant adults and bureaucratic cronies we encountered, this was never about any of them. It was about one little person, who didn’t ask to be born, but who needed to be loved when she was. We did that. We did that impeccably.
So to God be the glory.
I’m not over it, but I’m through it.
And I’m back with a vengeance.
In about 8 hours, I am going to my third visit with Fertility Centers of Illinois, to undergo a saline ultrasound, and as uncomfortable as that is going to be, I couldn’t be more excited. It’s like my birthday present to myself. PROGRESS. It’s the best gift I can give me.
That ultrasound, symbolizes that I am moving forward. It is one more way that I am boldly telling the universe that I am reclaiming my year. I am reclaiming my time. I am reclaiming my hope.
And if there is one thing you NEVER want to let someone get, when you want them to be stagnant, is their HOPE.
I got mine.
And I’m determined as hell, to help you get, keep, or maintain yours.
So the Egg is back, refurbished, and refocused. I am dedicating myself to taking you with me on this journey, as I’ve always done, but also in thinking forward into the success I plan to achieve, I want to also ensure that there is a legacy of information, collaboration, and awareness begun. I am aligning myself with individuals and organizations who seek to empower infertility patients, put information in the hands of those who need it and don’t yet know they do, and stand on the front-lines of our legislative needs.
Are you with me?
Good.
Because I am definitely with you.
Let’s get it.