Posts Tagged ‘The Emotions’

It’s not enough to look good in your clothes.

So, I’ve always been a big girl. Not necessarily HUGE, but I damn sure wasn’t a cheerleader. Again, this is something that isn’t altogether unheard of in the black community. Our community glorifies big butts and smiles. We talk all the time about down home cooking and grandmama recipes and we proclaim skinny bitches to be evil so that we can feel good about ourselves in our Ashley Stewart/Lane Bryant apparel.

And that’s cool. It’s great to see so many women be comfortable with their bodies nowadays. BUT, not if that woman is looking to have a baby.
As a woman who is pretty tall, my frame can support more weight than that of my shorter counterparts. And unlike most anorexics or other “big girls”, I usually see myself as pretty okay as long as my clothes look nice.

But that is NOT enough. Looking good in your clothes is just that, looking good IN your clothes. It is not necessarily healthy.

In the infertility game, this is also a struggle because its hard NOT to eat when you are so emotionally tossed around. I go up and down with this thing and my weight and I have to do better.

My doctor said something so profound to me today. She said, “We rush around all the time and don’t eat, then we go into starvation mode and what we eat gets stored instead of burned, and its one of the ways we show ourselves that we aren’t worthy. IF we thought we were worth it, and didn’t take ourselves for granted, we would take better care of ourselves” WOW.

So, my urge to my BBE sistas today is to fully investigate your body health. You’re worth it! And on the fertility aspect, if you were buying an apartment that was BEAUTIFUL on the outside but the former renter had left all kinds of junk lying around that you were UNABLE to move, would you rent the place? Well, how do you think a KID would feel trying to grow fingers and whatnot in a junky body?

The Waiting Game – Submitted Anonymously

The following was submitted anonymously by a great and loving friend of mine who graciously shared her story with us. Thank you to my special Broken Brown Eggshell!

The Waiting Game

I am 37 years old, married for 3 years, and we have no children. We have been on the journey towards motherhood for 2 years. I am grateful for my awesome insurance policy… a lot of people complain about HMOs, but I’m one that is grateful. There is the “waiting” game with the HMO but good things come to those who wait. I’ve learned to be proactive instead of reactive when it comes to my motherhood journey.

My husband and I became aggressive in the journey to motherhood in Nov. 08. Since then, we have been on a roller coaster ride… and I just say thank you Lord. Referred to an RE that we began seeing in Dec.08 only to learn that the HMO was dropping the clinic from its network in Feb. 09. So after hubby and I complete the necessary testing with the clinic we were faced with another referral for a new RE. We weren’t to excited about it, but by any means necessary. The new RE wanted to do further testing…still awaiting on more test to take.

I can’t say that I’ve been frustrated because I haven’t. I know God is the keeper of time and his time is always perfect. So every time I see a “belly” I whisper “God thank you for showing me what’s to come for us”.

1 11 12 13