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Joy

brokenbrownbell-the-other-side-of-my-infertility-part-2

I thought the entire time, I would get pregnant and that this would all be over. No one warned me that this is not a fight for the weak and that it lasts a lifetime. I was never this tough.

If I knew then, what I know now, I might have never started this fight.  My story is just what I described in previous posts, and to be honest I’d spent too much money to quit. After breaking my flexible spending account in February of 2011, like a bad gambling habit I was too far gone. The former me could never inject herself in the stomach with anything, and would never have paid that much for an injection of anything.

Looking at my bank account and knowing I was down to my last $500 for this cause basically made me turn everything over to my faith.

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in Adoption, Advocacy

FertileKwanzaa – Nia & Kuumba: Creativity in Purpose

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Originally Published 12.31.10 @ 9:56am

Habari Ghani?!

Nia & Kuumba!

Kwanzaa day five(yesterday) was Nia, which means Purpose.  As we walk the tightrope of fertility feelings, this is the  thought that may become hardest to pinpoint.  While I was totally perturbed yesterday when my server wouldn’t let me get my post out to you, as I thought about today’s principle, I realized that it was probably a divine,…well,… purpose, that may have led to that delay.

Today’s principle is Kuumba which means creativity.  As I thought about the combination of Nia and Kuumba, I was stuck for a moment as I tried to think about how these two principles have affected my journey.  I grasped the concept of Nia instantly because if there is anything that I have eventually come to terms with, it is my purpose in this journey.  I have come to believe wholeheartedly that the reason for my issues with fertility, are rooted in my being here for you.  I feel that I deal with this issue so that I can help you deal with yours.  That thought gives me peace.

in Latest

The Important Part is Past the Fear

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So, I was having a pretty rotten evening at work last night.  Not completely rotten, just one of those times where every parent that visited the library seemed to be one who just didn’t need to be a parent.  Yelling at their children, or just being verbally harsh.  Letting their toddlers play without supervision so they could troll Facebook.  Etc…You know, stupid crap.
I’m tired, irritable, and more than a bit ready to go home when one of our regular patrons, a young boy, comes in with his father.
in Latest

A Special Shout-Out

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A while back, I received this awesome email:

 My name is Kelly and I am a science teacher. I teach science and biology in our high school. A few of my summer students came across your site while researching for their current research project on topics related to fertility and reproductive health.

in Latest

Family Is Relative

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So yesterday was Easter.

I have to admit something to you right out of the gate: I’d seen a few statuses by my other infertility advocate friends that said things like, “With Easter coming up, you may need support…” and I thought, “Why?  What does Easter have to do with infertility?”

Wow, was I in for a surprise.  First of all, I was completely unaware that similar to Christmas and Halloween, apparently people equate colorful eggs and pastel clothing to cute children, therefore making childless couples unimportant.  They almost look at you as though, “What do YOU want?  You brought us nothing(no one) to play with.”  Forget the whole, Jesus being raised from the dead aspect of the holiday, we’re obviously supposed to be raving about the frilly-ness of skirts and the adorableness of miniature 3-piece suits.

in Advocacy, Coming Events, Hissues, Infertility, PCOS

What I Hope I Never Lose

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This week has been brought to me by the number 25(as in days until the gala), and the letter O for “overwhelmed”.Can we talk?*sigh*From writing for all these different sites to simply responding to emails, I’ve had a hard time staying on track because I…